Soul of the Blade Read online

  Dragana nodded. The steam was making her eyes water. They weren’t tears.

  Raeb placed his hand on her arm. “Dragana, tell me. What happened to the Bok’Tarong?”

  A tear fell. She pulled her arm out of Raeb’s. “I don’t know. I can’t hear Aeo any longer,” she admitted. She hated how hurt and vulnerable her voice sounded.

  “Aeo?” Mara asked.

  “The spirit in the blades. That was—is—his name.”

  She raised the Bok’Tarong from her lap and placed it on the table between them. Was it just her imagination, or did the rosy gold blades seem duller than normal? They were still beautiful beyond description, but they seemed … Dragana couldn’t bear to think it, but she couldn’t help it. The blades look dead.

  Raeb stared at the Bok’Tarong for a long moment, then reached down to his belt and unsheathed Sunray.

  Despite her pain, Dragana rose and grabbed his arm before Sunray came above the table.

  “I have to see if there’s still enough magic in the Bok’Tarong to maintain the enchantment,” he explained. “Sunray can reveal the extent of that. It’s the only way we can know for sure if the Bok’Tarong’s magic is still intact.”

  “Last time you used that thing it nearly destroyed the Bok’Tarong!”

  “I know. But I’m not channeling any magic, I’m just revealing it. I can control the blade and maybe even use it to help heal any damage.”

  “It’s because of that blade Aeo is out of reach to begin with. I won’t let you endanger him anymore.”

  Raeb raised an eyebrow and seemed to evaluate Dragana. “Is it the blade you’re worried about, or the spirit inside it?”

  Dragana froze. The blades were the most sacred of Taronese possessions. Their magic and their mission were supposed to come before all else. The spirit inside the blades was meant to be a guide, a mentor, and an advisor in the ways of the Entana. Nothing more.

  But Aeo was more than that. He wasn’t a Taronese warrior. He’d broken nearly every rule the Taronese knew about the Bok’Tarong and done things no ordinary spirit should have been able to.

  And Raeb was right. She was more worried about Aeo than the Bok’Tarong.

  Dragana released Raeb’s arm and fell back into her chair. She didn’t know what to say, to Raeb or to herself.

  He knew the rules as well as she did. To care about the spirit in the blades bordered on sacrilege. To put the spirit’s wellbeing above the Bok’Tarong’s mission crossed that line. The bearer of the Bok’Tarong knew that once they became the spirit in the blades, their personality meant nothing. Only their knowledge was kept in the blades, and the essence of the bearer was gone forever. All Taronese warriors knew and accepted that.

  But again, that wasn’t Aeo. He wouldn’t accept anything without a smartass remark and a bitter fight.

  Dragana ran her fingers around the rim of her cup. Aeo was much more than a simple spirit. He was unique.

  She didn’t object again as Raeb brought Sunray to the table. She shivered as its icy magic flowed forth, lingering in the air as it sought out magic. Her arm burned as frigid motes settled on her enchanted armband, the carving of her spirit. Dragana ignored it. She had to remind herself to breathe as she waited to see if they would be attracted to the Bok’Tarong.

  Finally, some migrated to the double-bladed sword. It was a tentative attraction at first. A mote here, a few there. They settled on the Bok’Tarong like fireflies being drawn to the darkness. Even Dragana was able to interpret their sluggishness—the magic was still there, but it was badly damaged.

  “I can try to infuse some magic into the sword,” Raeb said. “It might help the Bok’Tarong heal.”

  “Are you sure your blades won’t rebel again?”

  Raeb paused, just for a breath. “No. I’m confident I can control their hunger, but I can’t guarantee anything.”

  Instead of making her more nervous, Raeb’s blunt honesty assured her. He wouldn’t try to show off or do anything dangerous just to preserve his pride. Dragana appreciated that. But then again, could she refuse, knowing this was the only way to save Aeo? As much as she hated to put her trust in Raeb and that damned Sunray again, if she wanted Aeo back she didn’t have a choice. “Do it.”

  The temperature dropped as he exercised Sunray’s magic. Dragana kept her eyes on the motes surrounding the Bok’Tarong, praying to every god of Taron this would work. She needed the Bok’Tarong back.

  She needed Aeo back.

  Motes swirled around them. The air was still, but Dragana felt a breeze blow around her. Her skin prickled as goosebumps rose on her flesh.

  More magic settled on the sacred blades. It still wasn’t as much as they should have, but it was more. Hopefully it would be enough.

  Raeb lowered his blade, and the icy motes disappeared from view. He heaved a deep sigh, as if the brief moments wielding Sunray’s magic had drained him. He looked so exhausted Dragana wouldn’t have been surprised if he slumped to the table and fell asleep here and now.

  All eyes remained fixed on the Bok’Tarong. It didn’t look any different, of course. But still, they watched.

  18

  Oh gods, it hurts.

  How could it hurt? It’s not like he had a body anymore. But it did, more than he had ever hurt before. Even getting stabbed in the gut—and dying as a result—hadn’t compared to this. He felt like he was being ripped to pieces by a pack of wolves.

  No. Not wolves. By Entana. That seemed more accurate.

  What had happened? That terrible blade of Raeb’s had sought out the magic of the Bok’Tarong. Its touch had felt vile and oily, like the Entana.

  It had found the magic of his blades and began to sap it away. Aeo had felt his strength drain little by little, as if he was bleeding out on a battlefield. It wasn’t more than he could bear, not yet, but he had worried about having the strength left to fight once they reached the Entana hive.

  Dragana had tensed just as the sap on his strength doubled. Suddenly he wasn’t fatigued, he was exhausted to his very core. He didn’t have the energy to think, or do, anything.

  And that was when the pain had started. It hit him like a battering ram, running all the way through his essence. He hadn’t been able to tell where the pain began or where it ended. It was in him, surrounding him, consuming him. It was him.

  That was it. After that, his memory went blank. How much time had passed between then and now? He had no idea.

  The pinpoint light of Dragana’s presence, though reassuring, was almost too bright for him. Thank goodness she wasn’t holding him. It was hard enough to survive right now without the terrible lights and sounds of the outside world.

  As if she’d heard him, the light of Dragana’s presence blossomed. And of course, she didn’t move slowly so he could adjust. She must have run to him, because his vision was filled with light, and then the world burst into painful view as she picked him up.

  “Aeo?”

  Whoa, Dragana, not so loud.

  “Sorry.” Her voice didn’t drop all that much. “Are you all right? We were so worried.”

  I’m not sure if I can say I’m ‘all right,’ but I’m here.

  Her entire body relaxed. “Thank the gods of Taron.”

  Aeo tried to keep his mind blank of the sarcastic remarks skirting the edge of his thoughts. She was truly happy he wasn’t hurt. He didn’t want to spoil that, even if he didn’t feel like thanking any gods for how he felt.

  He looked around at Raeb’s and Mara’s relieved faces. Apparently everyone had been worried about him. Now the assassin tried to keep his mind blank of the overwhelming emotions that caused.

  Where’s Saydee? he asked.

  “She’s still sleeping off the baenlo leaves. I think she should be waking up soon.”

  He wasn’t sure, but he thought he saw Raeb and Mara trade a worried look.

  He couldn’t resist any longer. What happened to me?

  Dragana’s thoughts screamed Raeb tried to kill you,
but she spoke more rationally, with an effort. “Raeb lost control of Sunray. It started absorbing the Bok’Tarong’s magic. If it had taken any more, it might have destroyed you.”

  Chills ran through Aeo’s soul. He didn’t want to think about what would have happened if the enchantment holding his spirit in the blades had been absorbed by that vile Sunray.

  “Raeb infused the Bok’Tarong with magic after we’d discovered what happened, hoping that would be enough to keep you alive.”

  Well, I guess it worked. Thanks, Raeb.

  Dragana didn’t relay his thanks. She stood quietly, holding Aeo close as if she could protect him by her proximity alone. Her emotions were a jumble of fear and anger, mingled with relief. She couldn’t even look at Raeb without scowling.

  So … now what happens?

  From the way Dragana’s thoughts went blank and her eyes traveled to Raeb, accusing and angry, Aeo guessed they hadn’t quite figured that out yet. It wasn’t all that surprising. Their only plan had just spectacularly failed.

  Raeb searched and scoured his brain. There had to be some way to fix this. Saydee was still trapped in the baenlo sleep, Dragana was still angry with him, and they no longer had any way to reach the Entana hive. He was an intelligent man, with two hundred years of life experience to his name. Surely he could find a solution to at least one of these problems, couldn’t he?

  Two days of pacing and pondering, and he’d gotten nowhere.

  He’d spent every waking hour wandering around Mara’s small home. His mumbling had long since driven everyone around him crazy, but he pretended not to notice. He needed time to think, to figure out a way to make all this better.

  His hand strayed to the empty sheath at his hip. He hadn’t carried Sunray since the disaster. It had taken a full day to cleanse his mind of Sunray’s lust for the Bok’Tarong’s magic, and ever since he’d feared to take the blade back. If it was up to him, he’d abandon the damned thing and be free of its influence forever.

  But for some reason, he found himself missing its weight at his side.

  And there was problem number four. Even if Saydee’s connection to the hive had survived the disaster, he wouldn’t be able to use Sunray to strengthen it again. They couldn’t risk it, after it had overpowered him and the Bok’Tarong had barely survived. He had to find something else to strengthen her connection. If he couldn’t, they may never find a way to get to the Entana hive.

  Mara’s slow, measured footsteps coming down the stairs stirred him from his thoughts. He knew what she would say even before she approached him. Her eyes were dark and haunted, far sadder than they ever should have been. Raeb’s heart hurt to see her joy squashed by the weight of all this.

  “It’s been three days. None of the traditional remedies will wake her.”

  Raeb’s shoulders sagged. Saydee should have woken days ago. He and Mara had been painstakingly precise in their measurement of the leaves, so she shouldn’t have been overdosed.

  And yet, she could not be roused from the baenlo sleep.

  They went to Saydee’s room and looked down at the sleeping woman. She seemed even younger now than she usually did. Her chest rose in slow, deep, rhythmic breaths. It was clear this wasn’t a normal sleep. She was too still, lacking the twitches and shifting of everyday rest.

  “What do we do?” Mara asked.

  Raeb heard what she didn’t say. If someone didn’t wake from the baenlo sleep after this much time, they were given the distilled poison before they could waste away and starve to death. It was a mercy for them and their families. With no way to wake the sleeper, it was the only thing they could do.

  “I have to figure out why she’s still sleeping,” Raeb said.

  “How will you do that?”

  His pause, no longer than a handful of breaths, felt like an eternity. “I have no idea.”

  “Sometimes people can’t be saved,” she whispered.

  “And sometimes you can’t give up until you’ve tried everything,” he snapped back.

  Mara nodded, not in agreement but to appease his outburst. After a moment she looked up at him, her eyes as fully Entana as his. “Raeb, what has happened to you?”

  The simple, concern-filled question stunned him. “What do you mean?”

  “This anger you hold, the loss of control … I worry for you now as much as I did when Matow and I first met you.”

  Raeb shuddered. Mara and Matow had taken him in when he’d been at his lowest, frightened and begging the Entana for a death they would not grant him. He hadn’t lied when he’d said these wonderful people had shown him how to live. They’d saved him from a misery that would have driven him insane as surely as the Entana would have.

  “Things are … complicated. No matter which path I take, I’m risking much more than just my life. The pressure to do the right thing feels like too much most of the time.”

  Mara placed her hand on Raeb’s. “You will always make the right choice, Raeb. When all is said and done, that is the man you are.”

  He squeezed her hand, though he looked away from her when he spoke. “I’m not sure what kind of man I am anymore. The Entana have done so much to me … forced so much on my shoulders …” He met Mara’s eyes again. “I’m not the man you knew, Mara. Not anymore. And I’m not sure this man is one either of us would have liked.”

  She took him by the shoulders and looked at him with a gaze that saw beyond the physical and to a person’s soul. Raeb would never let anyone look at him like that, except for this woman who had come to replace the mother he no longer remembered.

  “I know you, Raeb. I see who you are despite all the actions that convince you you’re someone else. The Entana may ravage our minds, but they can only change us if we allow them to. No matter how hard they have tried to mold you into their instrument, you remain Raeb. The Entana do not control you any more than we are controlled by the Bok’Tarong. The threat may exist, but we continue on.”

  Raeb had been nodding absently, wishing he could agree. He wasn’t at all sure he’d remained the man he was. The Entana had changed him. He knew that in his heart as surely as he knew the threats Mara spoke of were true.

  Mara’s words tumbled together, mixing and stirring up in his thoughts. When they settled, his heart skipped a beat.

  As surely as the Entana were a threat to them, the Bok’Tarong was a threat to the Entana.

  How could he have been so stupid? The magic he’d fed into Saydee had been the pure, Entana-killing magic of the Bok’Tarong. Siphoned into a -taken. The Entana in Saydee’s mind must have recognized that power, felt threatened, and shut itself away. It would have locked Saydee’s mind into the tightest fortress it could have. And since she was under the influence of the baenlo, her mind was already restrained from all thought and action. Keeping her asleep would be the simplest and most defensible way for the Entana to protect itself.

  “Mara,” he said, leaning in to kiss her on the cheek, “you are brilliant.”

  The woman blushed, but her smile was radiant and filled with pride.

  Raeb turned back to Saydee, brushing his hand across her arm. Perhaps—just perhaps—he may have a way to save her. It would require some drastic measures, an unhealthy share of danger, and more than a little luck, but it might work.

  And he had to try. He wouldn’t let Saydee die until he knew there was no way to save her.

  He found Dragana meditating outside, the Bok’Tarong resting in her lap. It was bitterly cold, but the scents of wood smoke and clean evergreens, fresh snow and baking bread made it feel heartwarming if not body-warming. He exhaled, watching his breath fog the air before him.

  This was the first bit of luck he needed. He had to get Dragana to agree to help him, and he wasn’t at all sure she would. His last plan had almost destroyed the Bok’Tarong. She hadn’t forgiven him. But then again, he wasn’t sure she’d ever forgive him for that.

  He sat beside her in the same meditation pose. They didn’t speak for a while.
/>   Dragana’s voice was calm, but distant. “What do you want, Raeb?”

  “Saydee isn’t waking from the baenlo. Something’s keeping her asleep.”

  Dragana looked at him, her brown and crimson eyes staring into his. She didn’t flinch from his Entana gaze. Not anymore. “I know.”

  “I think I might be able to help her,” Raeb continued, “but it will be very dangerous. I can’t even begin to guarantee it will work. But it’s the only way to confirm what’s happening to her.”

  “And what do you think is happening to her?” There was no emotion in her voice, but Raeb wasn’t fooled. She kept her tone deadpan because her emotions were rioting. He could sympathize.

  “We infused Saydee, a -taken, with the magic of the Bok’Tarong. It hurt the Entana. It felt threatened, so it’s keeping her asleep because it sensed it was in danger. I didn’t even consider something like that happening.”

  “What are you suggesting we do?”

  Raeb smiled at the ‘we.’ “I need to speak with the Entana in her mind and hope I can convince it to let her wake.”

  “How would you speak to an Entana?”

  “There’s a ritual I know that will let my spirit enter her mind. It’s similar to the one I’d use to send our spirits to the hive. Once inside her mind, I can find where the Entana is and talk to it.”

  “He can talk to the Entana,” Dragana mumbled. There was a touch of disgust in her tone.

  Raeb ignored her and said the hard part, before he lost his nerve. “I’d like Aeo to join me.”

  Her eyes narrowed and her hand rested on the Bok’Tarong. Her voice was as cold as the ground freezing Raeb’s backside. “Aeo’s spirit is bound to the sword. He can’t leave it and enter the physical world.” Raeb noted a strange tone in her voice, one that hinted at something in their past, that she was determined not to mention. He was asking enough as it was, so he didn’t push for an explanation.

  “We won’t be in the physical world,” he replied. “We’ll be in Saydee’s mind.”

  Dragana glared at him with her all-too-familiar suspicion. “Why do you need Aeo to go with you?”